Live the American dream

Hi! My name is Mickey Bandit. I am a year old Chihuahua and I live in Manhattan in a one BR (bedroom) apartment with Ian. Firstly, let me tell you that if you're gonna live in this part of the city, the most important is to choose your human wisely at the adoption centre. Make sure they have.. umm.. a certain establishment in life. Be sure you smell this on them before you wiggle your tail and signal yes. Most humans seem to mean us well, but we are born to live in comfort, not be next to a homeless human begging and sleeping on the streets, which I sadly see too many of.

Anyways, moving on. Ian was a good choice, being an investment banker after all. Once I moved into my Lower East Side apartment, the first thing was to get my wardrobe set up. Winter was just around the corner. I was only going to splurge on one winter coat, so it had to be jazzy, with a fur hood of course, just thrown back casually over the shoulders. Winter boots- check, coloured socks- check check. But, what's New York without a little dress up? Oh, how I loved putting on my pulse quickening Halloween costume, and show stopping matching pajamas for the holiday season! I can't wait for the next dress up day already. Here are some public pics of my Bae(s), I don't want to share my personal pics for the fear of being stalked.

I am mostly an outdoorsy sorts, there's so much to do here- so many places to explore, new pop ups happening every weekend. Most places in the city welcome both me and Ian- coffee shops, shopping places, neighborhood bodegas and even the subway.  We always check into insta-worthy places where Ian can snap cute pics with me to update his dating app profile. I've heard that guys with cute dog get more right swipes.

We tried something different for the summers. We went to a different country where things were much cheaper. At first, I was super excited that the house there was sooo much bigger than ours in Manhattan. But I was soon aghast to see dogs on the streets roaming about by themselves, accepting food from strangers. I don't even make eye contact with strangers, and here they were getting all playful with these people. They were playing catch with sticks of tree branches. They didn't seem to own any soft toys. I'm not biting onto an unsanitized branch. So uncouth! Needless to say, I didn't want to be friends with them.

I'm so glad to be back home. It's fall now and there's a chill in the air. I'm loving the toasty indoors. I have stocked up on my soft toys for the fear of waking up to a day without any. Ian is working longer hours at office coz it's going to be appraisal season soon. If I get a little lonely at home, I just pop a few anti-depressants. Stoned, I watch the fast paced life below me, from my 17th floor apartment. I feel a tingling sensation just from the thought that I am going to be living the American dream life, living the best life my entire life.